6 Weeks

Samantha is 6 weeks old (well, 7 tomorrow, but 6 is more of a milestone!)

She has learned to do a lot since I last posted!

Her legs are really strong. She can practically stand up!  Her head is getting stronger too!  We hardly have to hold it up for her ever! Clever girl!

She started smiling! Wahoo!  So much fun.  

She also started cooing.  We've had some pretty good conversations, she and I! I have tried multiple times to get it on video, but she stops almost immediately upon the arrival of the camcorder!

She is getting cuter and cuter every day.  She weighs 9 lbs 8 oz., 21" long.  I look at pictures of her from 6 weeks ago, and can't believe how much she's grown already.  It makes me a little sad, but then she smiles at me, and everything's okay!

We love our girl!

She's a thinker!

She is definitely chubbier than she used to be.  When we took her home from the hospital, there was so much room in that hood!  Now we can barely zip it up!

A Girl and her Elephant--1 Month

I got this idea from a friend who did it with her daughter and her duck.  I thought it was so cute to see the change baby makes from month to month in comparison with a big stuffed animal, so I thought I would do it myself!

I cannot believe that Samantha is one month old today.  It has been the quickest, most rewarding month of my life.  She is such a joy!  Here are some things about Samantha you might want to know:

1. After a somewhat rough start, she is solely breastfeeding.  She'll still take a bottle if we need to go somewhere, which is nice, but she's gotten the hang of breastfeeding which I am grateful for.
2. Samantha hates being put down.  Even as I write this, she is grunting and moving around, even though I waited about 30 minutes of her being asleep before putting her down!
3. She cries when she's hungry and grunts the rest of the time.
4. She has only had one scream session which I'm grateful for.  If she gets what she wants, she'll settle down really quickly.  Such a good baby!
5. She typically likes taking baths, but it does stress her out somewhat.  We have yet to give her a bath without her spitting up all over her newly cleaned body, or peeing everywhere.
6.  She is such a strong baby.  From day one she tried and tried to keep her head up.  It was a little difficult then, but ever since, she's just kept on trying.  During "tummy time,"she can keep it up for a few seconds and then it gets pretty heavy so she puts it down again.
7. She loves her soother, but will spit it out even when she wants it.  I'm convinced it's because she just wants some attention!
8. She's been a great sleeper ever since she was born.  Right now, she'll usually give us a 4 hour stretch at the beginning of the night, then a 2-3 hour stretch after that.  During the day, she usually only sleeps for an hour or two at a time, so we are grateful that she's learned when night time is!
9. She loves having her hands by her face, and they are always in fists.  Sometimes it looks like she's getting ready to box someone!
10.  All in all, we couldn't have asked for a better baby.  She cries when she wants something but it is incredibly easy to calm her down. There are so many times when I just look down at her and wonder how in the world we got to be so lucky to not only have a baby, but to have such a good-natured one.  Derek and I truly are blessed to be her parents!

(This is her holding her head up!  Such a strong baby!)

Oh, and she wants to wish you all a Happy Valentine's Day.  This onesie was given to her by a friend of mine in our new ward.  So cute!

Baby Samantha

I know all of you know this already, but I still feel like I need to update this blog on the most important thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life:

Samantha Elizabeth Lee was born!

I'll update what happened since my last post. I can't really remember what happened on Sunday except that we didn't go to church because contractions were still occurring quite often, we went to Derek's parents for dinner, and I was SICK and TIRED of being in early labor. I went back to the hospital on Sunday night determined not to leave there until I was admitted. I wanted them to induce me or something. Get the party started already. I went into triage...again...willing to be as assertive or aggressive as needed to get what I wanted. The nurse wasn't quite as loving as I had hoped.

Nurse: You are 3 cm dilated, still 100% effaced.

Me: Isn't there something you could do to speed up this process? I've been doing this for almost 3 days now.

Nurse: Well, we are really busy.

Me: You are always really busy.

Nurse: Well, we don't have a single room available.

Me: (I shut my mouth at this point because I didn't want to do either of two things: 1) scream and shout at the nurse who really doesn't have anything to do with anything or 2) cry hysterically.

Once the nurse left to call the doctor to see what he/she wanted to do with me, I told Derek, "if I was 10 cm dilated, they'd find me a room..."

Needless to say, I was extremely tired, extremely emotional, and extremely irritated.

The nurse came back and told me that the doctor suggested I take some morphine, go home and try to get some sleep. A lot of times the morphine helps speed up the process.

Nurse: My bet is you will go home, get 4-5 hours of sleep and when you wake up, you will be in active labor. You'll come back in and be ready to have your baby.

Me: (in my head) Whatever lady...I hate you!

I had never really wanted morphine because I really didn't want to harm my baby. Finally, I had to remind myself, and Derek helped, that all medications have side effects, and they usually never present themselves. I was so tired after 3 nights of not sleeping at all, that the medication seemed like heaven. I took it and went home, crying the whole way.

I did sleep for 4 hours. Stupid nurse was right about that.

I woke up and felt a little wet. By a little, I mean, so little it was scary. I waited a couple of hours until I realized that yes, I'm pretty sure my water was leaking.

We went back to the hospital at 12:30. Got there by 1:00 a.m. Monday morning. Nurse was right again.

They checked to see if I was actually leaking and sure enough, I was. They checked my cervix: 4 cm dilated. Enough to consider me in active labor. I hate that nurse!

I was admitted at 2:00 a.m. and got a room in the labor and delivery unit around 2:30 a.m.

Everything after that was kind of a blur. It was a good thing Derek was there because doctors have asked questions since then, and I wouldn't have known the answer to any of them.

The doctor broke my water completely around 5:00 a.m. and after that, I realized what labor actually felt like. No relief...that's for sure. Contraction after contraction lasting forever with no time in between to breathe. It was definitely hard.

I caved and had an epidural at 7:30 a.m. Best decision I EVER made! After over 3 days of contractions (even if they weren't "active labor" contractions) and no sleep, I needed some relief. It was awesome.

I slept. I slept. And I slept some more. I'm not really sure all that happened between that time and the time I needed to push. I was completely out of it.

But, at 2:00 p.m., the doctor said I was at a 10 and ready to push.

I pushed for 1 1/2 hours. The entire time, the doctor kept saying that we were most likely going to have to use forceps or the vacuum because Samantha was not positioned correctly. They could never tell me how she was positioned. They couldn't tell themselves. Bizarre. I pushed every time I felt a contraction and it was the weirdest sensation since I really couldn't feel anything. That was the worst part about the epidural. I really couldn't remember how to push and it was hard to know if I was doing anything at all.

Finally, around 3:05-3:10, they were about to call someone in to do the forceps/vacuum. I never vocalized this while in delivery, but I REALLY didn't want that to happen. Like REALLY!!! I pushed again, Samantha somehow turned at the last minute and she was here.

She was born at 3:19, weighing 7 lbs 11 oz. and measuring 21 and 3/4 inches long.

She is absolutely perfect in every way. See for yourself!

Big yawn

She always sleeps with her hand to her face. Even in the womb!

All wrapped up, sleeping like a princess!

First bath at home. She didn't like it then, but she's loved it ever since.

She's just adorable!

Going home from the hospital

Just 4 hours after she was born. She is so alert!

Love her!

Just 4 minutes after she was born. I love the artistry of this picture, even if you can't see her very well.

55 Hours and Counting

Labor for 55 hours? Yep, that's right. That's how Courtney and Samantha like to do things!

Yesterday was an interesting day. We walked around our neighborhood for about 2 hours. I came home and took a shower. We ate lunch. Then we went to Derek's parents house to watch a movie (I thought it might be a good idea to walk on their elliptical while watching as well...) Throughout this time, contractions were still occurring, but they were still pretty inconsistent. Like 5-8 minutes apart. Lasting 1 minute to 1:30. Painful, but doable.

As we were watching the movie (Harry Potter Deathly Hallows Part 1 for those who were wondering), the contractions started picking up again. Closer together and MUCH more painful. They were lasting anywhere from 1:30 to 2 minutes and they were 2-4 minutes apart. This lasted probably 45 min to an hour. It wasn't fun, but I thought that this had to be it. I was wrong...again! We went back to the hospital (3rd times a charm, right), and I was 100% effaced but 1-2 cm dilated. AHHH!!! I was very tired, very disappointed, and very emotional. They sent me home. (I should really learn how to figure this stuff out...)

Last night was NOT fun. I couldn't sleep at all! I probably fell asleep after contractions but they were coming every 6-8 minutes (AGAIN...) and lasting just as long, so it wasn't really sleep. I took 3 hot baths last night. These were my life savers! Each time, it seemed to take the contractions away and I was able to sleep in the tub. Not the most comfortable sleep I've ever gotten, but it was sleep and I needed it. So, all in all, I probably got 2-3 hours of sleep last night.

*Just a digression, but WHY in the world does your body not let you get the sleep you need when it knows that you are going to be doing the most exhausting work in the next few hours (or in my case days or weeks:))? Plus, after she's here, I won't sleep either. I am already EXHAUSTED and I haven't really done anything yet. Awesome! *

So anyway, that's where we stand. I'm having to mentally prepare myself that Derek might go back to work tomorrow (why should he stay home during "early labor" when NOTHING is happening?) and I may go to my scheduled Dr. appt. on Wednesday. Heck, we might even get induced on Saturday like we had originally planned...

This baby is just having too much fun in there!

This mama is not having too much fun out here!

I guess we will continually keep you posted.

Due Date

Well, it's baby girl's due date...

We thought she just might make an appearance a day early, but things have changed drastically.

I started having pretty regular contractions at 2 a.m. on Friday morning. From 6 a.m. on they were 6 minutes apart lasting about 30-50 seconds. I knew it wasn't time to go in but at 8 a.m. I called Alberta Health Link to talk to a nurse and see when she thought I should go in. She said to start making your way to the hospital in four hours. So, that's what we did.

We knew that we were most likely going to be sent home because again, the contractions weren't really doing anything other than stay pretty consistent. After about 2 hours waiting and getting checked, I was 1 cm dilated and 75% effaced. They sent me home and told me to come back when they were 3-5 minutes apart, lasting about 90 seconds.

At 3:00 p.m. I was able to get about an hour of sleep, waking every once in awhile to breathe through some contractions.

At 4:30, I got in the shower and the contractions started picking up...like really picking up. Derek was timing while I was in the shower and I thought he was doing it wrong or something because I was having them consistently 3-5 minutes apart and lasting about 1 minute 10 seconds. They stayed that way for about an hour. We were going to go back to the hospital when one stupid contraction didn't come for like 8 minutes. After that, the contractions lost all consistency. Some were 6, some were 10, but none of them were close to 3-5 minutes apart anymore. They were, however, getting extremely intense. They started lasting closer to 1 minute 30 seconds and they hurt...pretty badly.

I called Health Link again at 8:30 p.m. knowing that if I went in, I'd most likely be sent home, but I also knew that if I didn't go in, I'd have trouble sleeping through the night, worried about what was happening. The nurse said that even if they are irregular, they recommend going in if they are lasting as long as they were for me...so I went in.

Yep, nothing had happened. 1 cm dilated, 80% effaced. (When the nurse told me I was 80% effaced, she tried to make it sound like that was good, like I had made SOME progress...yeah, I wasn't in the mood...)

We went home, got in bed and I was able to have a pretty decent sleep. I did wake to some painful contractions, I did take a hot shower at 5:00 a.m. this morning but really, the contractions have just slowed down immensely. When they do come, they last a long time (still about 1:30), but they really aren't as intense, as much as I'd like to say they are. So, that's where we are at. I haven't had a single contraction the entire time I have been writing this, so that should tell you something.

It doesn't look like baby is quite ready to greet us yet. With high hopes that she would come on her own and on her due date, no less, it's not looking so good. I'm frustrated, to say the least, but I know that she'll come when she's ready. I just hope it's not too much longer. 31 hours of labor is kind of long and there are no signs of it going any faster...

We'll definitely keep you posted.

New Year

2011 was quite a year, I must say.

It started by seeing an infertility specialist in early January and ended being practically 9 months pregnant with a baby girl.

In between, we went on a cruise, I finished my 2nd year teaching, we moved to Calgary and bought a house.

It's been crazy but worth every minute!

Here's to 2012 and the first addition to our family! She can come any time now!

Thanksgiving

I find myself struggling to write this post. Not because I don't have anything to be thankful for; just the opposite actually. I am overwhelmed with the many blessings that I have in my life. The one that I want to focus this post on is my miracle baby girl.

In a month and a half, our sweet little girl will be born. I cannot believe how long the 9 months has felt nor how fast it has seemed to go. But words cannot express how grateful I feel that she has entered our lives.

I think back to a year ago, to two years ago and the pain and heartache I felt as Derek and I were in the midst of our infertility battle. It was so difficult to keep such pain inside and I thanked God every day that I had Derek to help me through. To listen to me, to hold me when I cried, and to cry right along side me. He helped me through it all.

I remember especially, a year ago today, I was in Hawaii and wanted so badly to feel grateful for the things that I had. The fact that I was even there, in a tropical paradise should have been enough to feel grateful for. But, that Thanksgiving day, we found out that the previous month of trying to become pregnant, just like all the months before, had failed, and I felt a bit hopeless. I told Derek that I would fake being thankful that day, because I just couldn't bring myself to be thankful for anything when all I wanted was to be a mom.

Now, a year later, my gratitude is overflowing. I didn't know I could feel such love and gratitude towards God for sending such a precious miracle into our lives. I feel grateful for our struggles to get pregnant. More grateful than I think even I remember sometimes. There is opposition in all things. For all the pain and heartache, for all the tears that I shed, my gratitude for our precious gift is ten times greater. I wouldn't have known such joy if I hadn't experienced such sorrow. I'm grateful for my experience because every time I feel her kick inside me, I smile, knowing that I have been given the most precious of all gifts. Not only were we given our daughter, but we were given the memory of how hard it was and therefore how truly wonderful she is.

I can't wait to meet our little girl. I know that I won't be the perfect parent; in fact, I know that I will most likely make all of the mistakes I told myself I wouldn't make, and then some. But I do know that our daughter will be loved with all the love in my heart. She will always know that her parents love her, that they prayed for her, that they cried for her, and that they thank God every day of their lives that she entered theirs.

She is our Miracle Baby!

We love you Samantha!